A love that initiates
John 13 is such a powerful chapter.
I was in Chicago recently, visiting my friends Megan and Greg after the TGCW conference, and we found ourselves diving into this very passage. Greg made a point that really stuck with me: Jesus models a love that INITIATES. I agreed with him at the time, but the more I’ve reflected on it, the more I’ve realized just how wild and awe-inspiring that truth really is.
(SIDE NOTE: If you or someone you know lives in the Chicago area, especially Arlington Heights, I can’t recommend my friends' church enough! They have six locations, so there's probably one close to you. It’s definitely worth checking out if you’re looking for a church home!)
“We love because He first loved us.” — 1 John 4:19
Recently, I was in Chicago visiting my friends Megan and Greg after the TGCW conference. One night, we found ourselves deep in conversation about John 13. Greg said something that stuck with me:
Jesus models a love that initiates.
At the time, I nodded in agreement—but the more I’ve reflected on it, the more I’ve been in awe of how true and wild that really is.
(Side note: If you're in the Chicago area—especially near Arlington Heights—I can't recommend Megan and Greg’s church enough. With six locations, there's probably one close to you, and it’s a great place to find community.)
Initiating Love Takes Courage
Have you ever been the first to introduce yourself at a party? Or the first to say "I love you" in a relationship? It's vulnerable. There's risk. Rejection always lurks around the corner, and let’s be honest—we don’t like that feeling.
But what if vulnerability isn’t something to avoid—but something to embrace? What if it’s the very door to deeper connection and more meaningful relationships?
We serve a Savior who not only embraces vulnerability—He initiates it. Jesus didn’t just respond to love—He offered Himself fully, without guarantee of return.
John 13: Love That Bends Low
In John 13:3, we’re told:
“Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands, and that he had come from God and was going back to God, rose from supper…”
In full awareness of His divine authority, Jesus chooses humility. He kneels to wash His disciples’ feet.
Imagine what that must have felt like—your Teacher, your Lord, suddenly stooping like a servant, washing the dust off your feet. It would’ve been jarring. Intimate. Uncomfortable. Beautiful.
In that moment, Jesus shows us what love looks like: vulnerable, servant-hearted, and unafraid of awkwardness or risk.
This Isn’t New—It’s Who God Has Always Been
This pattern of initiating love isn’t new. From the very beginning, God has pursued us.
In Genesis, God created us in His image, reflecting His glory and goodness. But we rebelled. We turned away. And yet—even then—God didn’t withdraw. Instead, He made a promise (Genesis 3:15) to send a Savior to crush the serpent and restore what was broken.
God’s love doesn’t wait for perfection. It pursues, even after rejection. That’s what makes it so radical.
When Love Assumes All the Risk
When I was dating my husband, Adam, he made his intentions clear from the start. I was excited—but also overwhelmed. Things were moving fast, and I wasn’t sure if I was ready to give up my independence. But Adam didn’t pressure me. He told me he wasn’t interested in just being friends—he wanted to pursue me—but he was also willing to wait while I figured things out.
That kind of clarity and patience was new to me. It made me feel safe. He assumed the risk. He gave me space. And looking back, it reminds me of Jesus—offering love, not demanding it, but waiting with grace.
Sometimes, love means being the first to speak. The first to serve. The first to stay. Even when the outcome is uncertain.
Letting People In Is Risky—But Worth It
Inviting others into our lives, our homes, and our hearts is never easy. Vulnerability means letting people see our mess. It means risking disappointment. Sometimes it leads to deep connection… and sometimes it leads to hurt.
But God meets us in both. His grace fills the gaps when others fail us. And His Spirit gives us courage to keep showing up.
Letting people in has changed me. It hasn’t always been painless—but it’s been worth it. Through seasons of singleness, infertility, miscarriage, anxiety, depression, and major life transitions, it’s been the vulnerable friendships that have held me up. The ones rooted in honesty and trust. The ones that started with risk.
A God Who Went First
Jesus didn’t just teach about love. He demonstrated it.
He took the first step. He washed feet. He bore our sin. He risked everything for a relationship with us.
Now He calls us to go and do the same.
We were never meant to walk through life alone. God has given us one another as gifts—gifts for now and eternity. So let’s pursue each other with that same initiating love. Let’s step out in faith, even when it feels scary. Let’s open our hearts, knowing we don’t walk into risk alone.
What This Looks Like in Everyday Life
It looks like inviting someone to coffee and asking how they’re really doing.
It looks like sharing your testimony, even if your voice shakes.
It looks like saying “I’m sorry” first.
It looks like opening your door to someone who’s lonely.
It looks like praying for the courage to be honest, even when it's uncomfortable.
Love isn't always safe—but it is always worth it.
Jesus shows us that love initiates, love risks, and love redeems. And by His grace, we can do the same.
So let’s be people who love boldly. Who go first. Who let others in.
Because when we do, we’re not just building relationships—we’re reflecting the heart of Christ.
I’m thankful to be on this journey with you.
—April
